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Blobby Oil Corp.

We [I] are happy to announce the first Blobby Oil Corp. offshore rig is now operational. We [I] plan to provide a bountiful, but severely limited and taxed supply of oil to this wonderful community. We [I] would ask that we [I] be informed of Land Use Rights and Drilling Bylaws if those so apply. We [I] also would request formal Drilling Rights for the area. Now you may have some concerns or questions about our methods, but we [I] plan to answer all of them in my post.

Leadership Concerns:
You may wonder about the functioning of our Corporate Division, and if we [I] are qualified to run such a potentially hazardous operation. Don't worry, I've spent ten minutes skimming a Wikipedia page, and I am fully confident I can use enough Oil sounding words to sound as though I am highly educated in Oil.
As for the White Collar jobs, construction on a luxury resort has already begun, to provide our staff [Me] with the most gratifying experience while on the job. Our workers receive either pay or benefits, as well as a two hour break for Christmas. (Workers needed, see lower for details.)

Environmental Concerns:
Though an oil spill would result in a 99.99% reduction in aquatic species, it is quite easy to use your imagination to move the period to make 9.999%. Besides, all our platforms will be manned 10/6 by pumpkin headed fences with levers for arms as soon as I find a pumpkin patch. Safety is our No. 2 concern here at Blobby Oil Corp. (BOC.) We will be holding a special meeting for players with environmental concerns in the deepest pit of lava in the nether. Please head that way if you have said concerns. Wearenotheldresponsibleforanyaccidentsthatoccur,andwillnotpayanyamountofmoneytofix
anyprolemsthatmayormaynotoccur.Nogivsiesbacksies.

Oil Concerns:
Though Oil may not exist in Minecraft, we assure you that what we are doing is perfectly legitimate, and has no sneaky backhand deals behind it. We are a company that prides itself on openness, so please confront us [Me] at any time . (Except in the shower.)

Tax Concerns:
Because we are a Moderation Affiliated Corporation, BOC. will have to collect a start-up tax of half your diamonds, followed by a weekly management tax of the other half of your diamonds. Failure to pay this tax could result in both your assassination, and a complete collapse of the largest business on this server, sending it into a spinning economic decline. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

Job Concerns:
By now, you probably want to get a job here at BOC. and we [I] are thrilled to announce several openings in our Management jobs, in our Construction jobs, and in our I'mlonelyhereandwantafriend jobs. Please fill out an application, available at the press conference, or on our platforms. Please note that none of our employees may be Psychic. (Though seriously, I wouldn't mind if someone wanted to come build with me. {I'd give you CO-CEO})

Any other Concerns can be E-mailed, Texted, Faxed, Pictogrammed, Smoke Signaled, Written in blood on the back of the Refrigerator in my house, or answered in the upcoming press Conference. The Conference will be held when we [I] are on the server. Simply ask us the question, and we will respond publicly. (Unless your question is damaging to this company, in that case remember that if you don't have anything nice to say, shut your trap.)

Thank you for taking the time to read this, and we look forward to serving you and satisfying your need for oil.
-Blobbydude
(Founder, CEO, and builder of Blobby Oil Corp.)

Comments

  • I'm not sure you'll have many people wanting to move because most of the regulars have built homes by now. All the same, I know it does get lonely so you can ask pz if you can make a drilling plant on our island.

    I'm also legitimately interested since there is no oil in minecraft. haha
  • Did you just invite an oil company to do exploratory drilling on OUR ISLAND? Next thing you know, there'll be leaky pipelines all over the place and dead oil-covered chickens and poisoned squid washing up on the beach.
  • Think of the chickens! We can't have our poor chickens covered in oil! The oil really throws off the taste when cooked.
  • @PZ, I grabbed some carrots and pumpkins along with some chicken eggs at your place. I didn't have anything nice on me to offer so as I was waiting on the chickens to produce eggs I breeded the chickens. So you should have about 3 times more chickens in the tree house area. :P
  • I've got so much of that simple stuff, anyone should feel free to take some. The chicken pit produces so many eggs I've just been hurling them into the tree farm to stock the island.
  • edited June 2014
    I actually have a true purpose for Blobby Oil Corp.
    It is to be a pipeline, but not of oil, but instead, of players. I'll build an oil platform/derrick at people's houses, with a Portal inside, which goes to a network of pipes in the nether connecting people together, much like the Inflammable path of the previous map. I plan to do it for free, but donations are appreciated. (Mainly Stone for the pipes.)
  • i super enjoyed reading your post. and sorry for sneaking up on you in the shower that time...

    Does the derrik have to look like a derrik?
  • I could fiddle with the details if you wanted me to, but I would prefer it to look like one. (Look at PZ's island to get an idea of what it would look like.)
  • Here:
    http://mc.sitosis.com/map/#/-287/64/-1020/max/0/0

    Not MY island, though -- there are 4 of us developing it.
  • You should name it then, I don't know what else to call it.
  • Then I hereby dub it…CRAGGY ISLAND.

    We'll need a parochial house for Father Ted.
  • "Not MY island, though -- there are 4 of us developing it."

    Well it originally was until the players of the server got a little lonely and all decided to move there. haha

    Craggy island it is.

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